Artisan by Dan Joyce
©2016
Post 11
The Meth Maid
“It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it!”
“Yes. It is.”
“Want a cigar?”
“Sure!”
“The man came in and played music for us at school today. He has a electric guitar and plays really good. I like it when he does that.”
“Sounds great, Craig!”
“I wonder what we’re having for dinner tonight. I hope its hamburgers! Hey can you help me light my cigar. I can’t see too well. Years ago, I was on a bus stop and some gang members pulled by in a car and threw acid in my eyes. I didn’t do anything to them. Now, I’m pretty much blind.”
“Did they ever catch them?”
“No, I don’t know. I don’t think so. Hey, I hope we have Ding Dongs for snacks tonight.”
“That’d be great!”
“You know, when I was younger, I was at the park and some girl came along and kissed me. So, I made out with her. She moved into my house and started cleaning it everyday. I couldn’t figure her out. But it was worse, because all she wanted to do was screw! I wanted to go out on a date or something, but she just wanted sex. I couldn’t keep up with her. Then, I snuck around and cheated on her once and she caught me and left. She never came back again. I never met a woman like that. Why do you suppose she was like that?”
“Let me guess… meth?”